caycay | I've Been Lonely

He says never mind, but Cater shakes his head. It's important progress that Idia's making, being able to identify when his fears are unfounded, but he wants to make sure that his boyfriend knows he's heard. Seen. He knows how hard it can be, feeling like there's something inherently wrong with yourself.

"It's completely natural." He kisses him again, first on his temple and then on his cheek. "I am the farthest thing from disappointed that I could possibly be, because it just means I get to rile you up all over again."

The last thing he wants is for Idia to feel as if he's put some kind of blemish on their special night. Smiling against Idia's hair he teases, "and besides, you have the most amazing O-face."

So Cater wants tonight to be a roller-coaster of ecstasy. Idia can't imagine how it will feel to be taken to that peak again and again until exhaustion, but oh how he wants to experience it. The kisses spark a breathy chuckle from him and he nuzzles just under Cater's ear in return.

Wait, his "O-face?" What's... oh, okay, he gets it. His smile spreads into a teasing grin. "If we're talking O-faces, yours is top tier, too. I can't wait to see it again." Thinking about Cater's wild eyes and panting mouth has him twitching against his boyfriend's thigh. It's a much more pleasant thought than his usual gloomy musings, and the reactions of his body to it will surely encourage Cater to ravage him again.

"Is it?" Cater smiles even wider, that spark of mischief returning to his face--so they're both looking at each other with an equal sort of playfulness. "In that case, I have the perfect thing to keep you busy while your power bar fills up again."

He doesn't have to do much in the way of explaining. Moving away from Idia just enough to undo and pull off his own pants and underwear, his own cock is clearly standing at attention, waiting for its turn. Kicking the clothing away, he's rolling back into his boyfriend's arms. "If you can still feel your hands, that is."

Seeing his boyfriend nude is a good motivator to wriggle out of his top the rest of the way, so Idia makes good on the time Cater’s out of his arms to do exactly that. The skin on skin contact is well worth the minimal effort. One arm drapes around Cater’s back while the other glides down his side and hip, all while Idia’s eyes stay fixed on Cater’s.

He wants to do what Cater just did for him, but his proficiency isn’t high enough and with his teeth he could do real harm. Ugh, stupid Shroud curse side-effects. This skin has so many debuffs. So instead he curls his fingers around Cater’s erection, grateful that snuggling and a previous orgasm has taken some of the chill out of his hands. He starts with light, loose strokes, teasing and building up the way he’s learned. Then, wanting to feel the pulse of arousal, he gradually peppers in a few firmer but still slow strokes here and there without much of a pattern. Anticipation is key, after all. He wants to kiss his boyfriend at the same time but the need to watch Cater’s expression change is such a powerful impulse too.

Cater murmurs in happy appreciation when Idia's fingers make first contact. Having resisted touching himself outside of involuntary friction, his cock all but jumps into his boyfriend's palm. His hip presses in a little closer, and this time he can't help but steal a few kisses as they're getting started, already missing the feeling of the press of his sapphire lips.

Just like last time, however, he gets drawn in by that steady golden gaze--he can feel Idia drinking in every sigh. It still makes him feel so good, being so completely seen, like every single twitch is being memorized. There's no way his preferences will be overlooked or ignored. Everything about him, Idia makes feel like such a priority. As Cater's breath starts to grow more labored, his flush spreading down his neck, he gives a slight, husky laugh. "Remember when I told you I could imagine all the things you could do with your hands?"

Back then, of course, Idia hadn't picked up on the innuendo and Cater hadn't bothered to clarify.

Now he gets it, with more time spent around Cater's teasing. Idia giggles, that "ke ke ke" a lot of people find creepy, but with the lightheartedness behind it it's more dorky and cute now. His hand works its magic over Cater's cock, pausing now and then to rub over the crown with the pad of his thumb. "You liked this last time," he chuckles. "One of the advantages of grouping with an elite gamer."

Gods, his boyfriend is so beautiful with that flushed face and his pink lips parted around hot breaths. Well, he's beautiful no matter what, but Idia loves when Cater's turned on because of him. He really is memorizing everything about the other boy, wanting to make Cater know he has a permanent place in his heart. Not only that, he wants those memories to cherish when they're apart. For someone as isolated as Idia, separation from Cater has become an ache that persists until the next time they're together.

"While I've got you like this, there's something I should probably tell you." His crooked grin, sharp and sly, makes his eyes gleam predatorially.

Cater's eyes are fluttering as his pleasure builds further, his stomach starting to feel tight. "Hm?" There's a second or two delay in his brain, his hands resting at Idia's waistline. "Something you should tell me while you've got me like this?"

He can't help but give another breathless laugh as he repeats the statement in a bit of curious disbelief. It's hard to look coy when he's in this position, groaning as Idia works in more technique, the manipulation of the head of his erection sparking a much more intense sensation.

"Well, I'm all ears."

Idia says nothing, quickening his strokes with that teasing grin still in place. He wants to feel Cater throb in his grip, wants to hear his breathing stutter into a groan of release. He has his boyfriend where he wants him, but it’s not the right moment yet. Instead he lays kisses along Cater’s jaw, lips at the pulse in his neck, nips his earlobes.

Yes, he’s being a tease, but it’s only fair. Besides, he knows Cater loves it. Idia’s confidence is growing, and with it his need to repay Cater for all that he’s given in their time together. So he urges his boyfriend onto his back, halfway hovering over him as Cater did to him before, and gazes down into his eyes with a look that softens from sly to sweet.

“Let me see you lose control first, and I’ll tell you.”

There's no way to stop his curiosity from morphing into anticipation when Idia leaves the question unanswered, stroking him with more insistence. "Ah," he whines on a moan, arching closer into him, "so mean!"

But just as Idia surmised, Cater is clearly enjoying himself, and there's no malice in his accusation of cruelty. In fact, the teasing has an obvious effect on him physically as Cater begins to squirm, legs restless. When Idia moves them into position so he's over him, Cater's arms snake around his back, hugging onto him, his legs bending upward at the knees.

It's always been obvious how brilliant Idia is--the Ignihyde Housewarden was a genius in so many ways, but how fast he's learning in something like this, too, really drives the point home. Even for a virgin, his experience with his own body had been so minimal, but he's absorbed their time together like computer programming. Cater's adoration is a whole new hit of pleasure. Someone so incredible willing to be with him, date him...

His brow furrows, arms squeeze the boy above him more tightly.

So beautiful… Cater is gorgeous and funny and so sweet, how did someone like Idia get lucky enough to earn his affection? They fit together perfectly, bonded in their past trauma even as they heal each other. And now they have tonight to share. Idia couldn’t ask for anything more.

“If you trust me, close your eyes.” He wants Cater to come undone and to do the same to him in turn. He won’t be afraid of messing things up, not when Cater believes in him.

Even if Cater didn't feel as if he was coming apart at the seams, Idia's the one person he'd respect such a request from without question. "Of course I trust you," he tells him even after he shuts his eyes, feeling the need to reaffirm the concept out loud. More than trust you, he wants to say, but doesn't have the bandwidth left for further thought

Idia knows he does, but having that trust affirmed in this way is a huge deal. Carefully he extracts himself from Cater’s arms and slides back, eyeing his target. Just once, slow and steady… that should push his boyfriend over the edge.

He leans down, gripping Cater’s hips and taking a deep breath before slowly running his tongue up the underside of the other boy’s erection in a broad stripe. No danger from his teeth, just a wet, warm, unexpected tongue. It’s weird to have any part of his mouth there, but if it feels half as good to Cater as it did when Idia experienced it…

Trust aside, Cater can't help but whine in protest when Idia disappears briefly from his arms. His weight doesn't shift off the bed, but even so he can't help but wonder what exactly it is that his boyfriend is planning here. Maybe, based on how much he's been learning from example, Cater should've expected what does come next. Still, somehow it's completely out of his imagining, and so when the new sensation meets his shaft, his whole body jolts in thankful surprise.

A cry escapes him. Cater calls out Idia's name in a mixture of shock and pleasure, reaching blindly for him as he forces himself to keep his eyes shut. More than anything else it's the element of surprise that sends shivers of ecstasy rocketing through him, his throbbing cock going from leaking to bursting by the time Idia's tongue reaches the top. "Don't stop," he begs, voice hinging on desperate, needing to feel that contact through the rolling wave of his orgasm.

Cater’s sudden orgasm takes Idia by surprise, nearly causing him to yelp as a few drops hit his cheek. He almost closes his mouth over the head but stops at the last second as he remembers his teeth. Instead he tries to catch as much as possible with his tongue alone but it’s such a mess. He gets some but it’s also all over Cater’s abdomen.

Well, he tried, and that look on his boyfriend’s face is worth the attempt, even considering the weird taste in his mouth now. He’ll help clean up in a moment. Carefully he leans over Cater to look into his face. “Look at me?” he asks softly.

Breathing hard, Cater cracks one eye open and then another. "Come here, you sneak," he huffs, reaching up to pull Idia down into a kiss. He has the salty taste of him on his tongue but none of that matters, and as Cater's mind starts to clear he bursts out into a fit of breathless giggles. "I didn't know if I was allowed to open my eyes."

Smiling wide, he keeps his forehead pressed into Idia's. His whole body is still throbbing, heart pounding, and he can feel his cooling spunk all over his abdomen. "Not too bad for a first try."

“Mmm.” Idia appears outwardly calm, but his heart is beating fast. It’s not anxiety but elation, knowing that what he’s done and what he’s about to do are momentous leaps in his development. Every day with Cater, he’s becoming a better person. That deserves more than he can ever repay, but he’s going to offer one thing he can toward that debt.

He pulls back just enough that he can look into Cater’s eyes again, his hair spilling around them like a shining pastel curtain. Idia looks softer than his boyfriend has ever seen him, his eyes damp with happy tears.

“I love you, Cater Diamond.”

When did Idia become so amazing and surprising him? Those few words reverberate around in his head as he stares into his boyfriend's face and he feels--well, he feels. So, so much, and all of it is so incredible. They haven't said it, had they? Cater had used the L-word, said he'd been in love with him, but now...

"Idia," he says in a choke, voice small and eyes watering in turn. "I love you, too."

They've been dating for all of half a week, but what does any of that matter? It feels now like he's known that this was his person since the moment he first laid eyes on him. It didn't matter how they appeared to be like oil and water. There was just something inside of him that couldn't let go even when it had felt like some kind of impossible ending.

He lets out a laugh and then a sob. His body is floating, his heart is full to bursting. He's a hot air balloon tethered to the ground by the most beautiful boy in the whole world.

The managed to avoid the bad end, though it felt like they nearly picked the wrong dialogue options. But this can't be the good end, either.

"I think we're the true end route."

“Yeah…,” Idia sniffles, tears finally spilling over onto Cater’s face. “Yeah, I think we are.”

He leans down again, forehead to forehead, nose to nose, and closes his eyes to simply live in this moment for a while. He’s never felt so alive, so whole. Cater took a chance on him and Idia took a chance in return, and look at them now. Something has locked into place between them, but instead of restraining or separating them it’s set them free.

Somehow, Idia will do everything in his power to keep them together, and not Riddle or graduation or STYX will stop them.

Who knew how overwhelming it could be to feel such happiness? To smile so much it hurt, to laugh and cry and hold someone and mean all of it. Cater had never been so painfully, obsessively aware of his own heart before. He just wants to bury himself against Idia and never let go. School, family, everyone and everything else, none of it mattered anymore. It could all be anything and he'd be content with it so long as he got to see Idia, to curl up beside him at the end of the day.

"Can we just hold each other for a little while?" He knows he doesn't need to ask, but it's all he wants, to bask in their mutual confessions. To have their heartbeats find time together and savor the gentle satin of Idia's skin against his own.

They really should clean up, but Idia doesn’t want to separate any more than Cater does. With a quick nod he curls up with his boyfriend in his arms, basking in the glow of feelings returned. Loving someone else this intensely would be impossible, Idia doesn’t love easily, but he does love intensely. He almost didn’t let Cater in. Now the thought of pushing the other boy away is abhorrent. He came so close to losing this without ever having known it.

“Can you imagine if our freshmen selves could see us now?” His chuckle is a bit watery. “This feels like a dream. I was a happy kid before… before everything went wrong, but never like this.”

"They'd think it was fanfiction," he replies, cheeks starting to grow sore from the smile he can't wipe from his face. "At least, you would've." If he'd really, really realized how he'd felt about Idia back then? Cater isn't sure what he would've done. Probably panicked as hard as he had when Idia opened up to him, but whether he would've felt emboldened or otherwise is hard for him to say. Maybe they would have been dating for longer. Maybe he'd have transferred into Ignihyde after all.

"But I know what you mean. I didn't know that life could feel like this." Like a dream, just like he said. "It's so much better than any dream I've ever had. And we never have to wake up from it."

Idia sighs in contentment as his lips find Cater’s, first in chaste little kisses and then gradually growing more passionate. He’ll never get enough of kissing his boyfriend, holding him close and touching him, hearing the sounds of his pleasure. He truly does love Cater with every fiber of his being. Now they have their entire future to explore together.

Thoughts of giving Cater his virginity still felt a little scary this morning, but now whatever reservations he might’ve had are completely gone. He’s ready, knowing that it will actually mean so much more after their mutual confession. He wants to do it now but at the same time he’s so happy to hold Cater quietly and kiss his beautiful smiling face.

Needing to regain his own stamina as well, Cater is comfortable in Idia's arms. He feels like he's in a warm cavern filled with the soft glow of Idia's hair, and each and every kiss they share is more special than the last. He could get lost like this for hours, forgetting where his body ended and his boyfriend's began.

After a little while, though, he feels his body start to heat itself up again, the slide of skin on skin becoming more alluring and sensual. With that shift, he murmurs, "are you ready for more?"

There’s no hesitation when Idia nods, that loving smile never wavering. “Yeah, I think we’re both ready for the next round.”

His heart’s starting to flutter again. Having done research on his own and with Cater, Idia has some idea of what to expect, but even in his own limited experience there are things he hasn’t tried. He knows they’re necessary, he just hopes he doesn’t tense up out of reflex.

“You’re the party captain so I’ll follow your lead. Tell me what you need me to do, okay?” He kisses the tip of Cater’s nose, then the spot between his eyebrows.

Edited 2022-11-21 04:17 (UTC)

"I just need you to let me know how you're feeling," Cater tells him as he (somewhat reluctantly) peels himself away from Idia to retrieve the bottle of lube he'd purchased from the city and previously stashed in the nightstand. "I want to make sure you're as comfortable as possible."

He knows there's only so much he can do, but as long as Idia's keeping him updated on what he can and can't handle, it'll all hopefully go smoothly. "We'll work up to it, but it's probably going to be an awkward sensation at first..."

Setting himself up between Idia's legs, he sets the lube down beside his own thigh for now. He wants to get Idia's body warmed up a bit before he starts inserting anything with the hopes that it'll take a bit of the edge off of having a sudden, strange intrusion. So to start, he leans in to use his mouth once more. This time, since he's using his tongue before Idia's ready to blow, he should be able to enjoy it all a bit longer. Easing back the foreskin, Cater starts to work him, bobbing his head with slow deliberation farther and farther, hoping to fit him in all the way to the base.

Edited 2022-11-21 05:27 (UTC)

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