caycay | I've Been Lonely

"They'd think it was fanfiction," he replies, cheeks starting to grow sore from the smile he can't wipe from his face. "At least, you would've." If he'd really, really realized how he'd felt about Idia back then? Cater isn't sure what he would've done. Probably panicked as hard as he had when Idia opened up to him, but whether he would've felt emboldened or otherwise is hard for him to say. Maybe they would have been dating for longer. Maybe he'd have transferred into Ignihyde after all.

"But I know what you mean. I didn't know that life could feel like this." Like a dream, just like he said. "It's so much better than any dream I've ever had. And we never have to wake up from it."

Idia sighs in contentment as his lips find Cater’s, first in chaste little kisses and then gradually growing more passionate. He’ll never get enough of kissing his boyfriend, holding him close and touching him, hearing the sounds of his pleasure. He truly does love Cater with every fiber of his being. Now they have their entire future to explore together.

Thoughts of giving Cater his virginity still felt a little scary this morning, but now whatever reservations he might’ve had are completely gone. He’s ready, knowing that it will actually mean so much more after their mutual confession. He wants to do it now but at the same time he’s so happy to hold Cater quietly and kiss his beautiful smiling face.

Needing to regain his own stamina as well, Cater is comfortable in Idia's arms. He feels like he's in a warm cavern filled with the soft glow of Idia's hair, and each and every kiss they share is more special than the last. He could get lost like this for hours, forgetting where his body ended and his boyfriend's began.

After a little while, though, he feels his body start to heat itself up again, the slide of skin on skin becoming more alluring and sensual. With that shift, he murmurs, "are you ready for more?"

There’s no hesitation when Idia nods, that loving smile never wavering. “Yeah, I think we’re both ready for the next round.”

His heart’s starting to flutter again. Having done research on his own and with Cater, Idia has some idea of what to expect, but even in his own limited experience there are things he hasn’t tried. He knows they’re necessary, he just hopes he doesn’t tense up out of reflex.

“You’re the party captain so I’ll follow your lead. Tell me what you need me to do, okay?” He kisses the tip of Cater’s nose, then the spot between his eyebrows.

Edited 2022-11-21 04:17 (UTC)

"I just need you to let me know how you're feeling," Cater tells him as he (somewhat reluctantly) peels himself away from Idia to retrieve the bottle of lube he'd purchased from the city and previously stashed in the nightstand. "I want to make sure you're as comfortable as possible."

He knows there's only so much he can do, but as long as Idia's keeping him updated on what he can and can't handle, it'll all hopefully go smoothly. "We'll work up to it, but it's probably going to be an awkward sensation at first..."

Setting himself up between Idia's legs, he sets the lube down beside his own thigh for now. He wants to get Idia's body warmed up a bit before he starts inserting anything with the hopes that it'll take a bit of the edge off of having a sudden, strange intrusion. So to start, he leans in to use his mouth once more. This time, since he's using his tongue before Idia's ready to blow, he should be able to enjoy it all a bit longer. Easing back the foreskin, Cater starts to work him, bobbing his head with slow deliberation farther and farther, hoping to fit him in all the way to the base.

Edited 2022-11-21 05:27 (UTC)

Poor Idia slams a hand over his mouth to stop a loud cry, his legs trembling as Cater’s mouth sinks down on him. Now that he’s only at the start of arousal rather than close to peaking, he gets to feel the gradual build in pleasure. It’s hot and wet and how far is Cater going to go before he chokes?!

When his boyfriend’s nose bumps his abdomen, Idia covers his face with both hands, trying to steady himself. He has to fight down the urge to buck his hips, the wash of pleasure pushing out a muffled groan instead. “S— so warm…”

After fully deepthroating Idia's stiffening member, Cater backs up and off to catch his breath. Already, that look on his boyfriend's face has his eyes gleaming. "What are you holding your voice in, for?" He teases, running his palm along the underside of the shaft once before he grabs the lube. "I wanna hear it all, you know."

Popping the lid of the small bottle, Cater pours a small amount on a finger of his dominant hand. "Sorry, this might feel a little cold," he warns before reaching down to press the lubricated digit carefully against Idia's anus, slowly inserting up to the first knuckle.

That first knuckle means barely an inch of penetration but it’s still something going in. It’s weird and cold and slightly uncomfortable but not painful, so Idia bites his lip and tries to breathe through his brain keysmashing. Fingers clutch the sheets at his sides. He wants this, wants Cater, and he won’t let his stupid cursed twiggy nerd body say no!

Keeping a watchful eye on Idia for his reactions, Cater moves his free hand to wrap around his shaft and treat it to smooth, soothing strokes. "It takes some getting used to," he says, hoping that the sound of his voice will help. The more distractions he can provide, he thinks, the easier it might be to keep Idia from hyper-focusing on any discomfort. "It'll feel better once that happens."

And when he reaches the prostate, of course, though Cater decides against being that specific. Instead, he keeps going, moving his finger deeper in inch by inch, gauging when he should pause based on Idia's expressions. Keeping his other hand busy, Cater seeks out the telltale indicator that he's found the gland, curling his fingertip upward to press in and stimulate.

Cater’s hand moving over his erection helps with the discomfort but still doesn’t erase the weirdness. Idia squirms, lip still clamped in his teeth and high, thin whines jolting out of him every time Cater’s finger pushes deeper.

It’ll be better when he’s really in me. The goal is worth the grind. I can do this.

And then Cater hits something inside him that sends a powerful shock through Idia’s entire body. The Housewarden chokes on a shriek, eyes flying wide open and his grip on the sheets tightening until his knuckles crack. His heels scrabble and slide on the sheets as his legs jerk. In Cater’s grip his cock pulses, twitches, dribbling pre-cum down his length and over his boyfriend’s fingers.

The reaction is so above and beyond anything that Cater was anticipating that he stops what he's doing immediately, holding both hands still and steady as he stares at Idia with wide-eyed concern. It was an incredibly hot display, mind you, and he feels a burst of immediate pleasure in his gut as he watches, his face flushing, but more than that is a worry that he'd done too much.

"I-Idia, are you alright?" He has no idea if the other boy will even be able to respond properly, but he has to ask. "I can stop, do you need me to stop?"

Two seconds after Cater stops moving, Idia collapses with a drawn-out "guuuuh," blinking owlishly. There's a rhythmic twitch in his left thigh muscle matching the throb in his cock. He takes a few deep breaths, his eyes slowly regaining some clarity.

"Wh-- what in the Underworld was that?!" Gods, it felt like Cater pressed a switch that set off a bunch of nerves at once. He'd gone from a slow simmer to feeling like he was about to erupt in an instant.

Oh, Seven. How to even begin to explain this? Even Cater, who doesn't get embarrassed particularly easily, feels a little silly putting it into words. "That was your prostate," he says, deciding that a clear and concise approach is probably best. "It, uh, it controls semen flow."

And it's basically the male equivalent of the g-spot, he nearly adds before realizing that it would be completely irrelevant information.

"It can be kind of intense, especially since you've never had it stimulated before. Sorry! I should've warned you!" Though he has a bit of a feeling that even if he had, it still would've thrown Idia for just as big of a physical loop.

"Gods...," Idia breathes, letting go of the sheets to rub his eyes with one hand. "I thought I shorted out. Read up on the operations manual but didn't check the system specs." Frankly, he was too embarrassed to do anatomical research. Meat bodies are so weird and messy compared to tech. He kinda envies Ortho for that.

He takes a minute to catch his breath, belatedly realizing Cater still has a finger inside him. Oh yeah, they're still in the middle of a start-up checklist. Puffing out his cheeks before blowing out a long breath, he nods to his boyfriend. "I'm okay, promise. Keep going?"

The way that Idia responds gives him a bit of a chuckle, and he leans over to give him a sweet kiss. "Okay," he agrees. "I won't hit it so hard this time. Not unless you ask me to."

Mentally noting to stick to lighter touches, Cater starts to slide in a second finger. He's careful not to stretch too wide, knowing that from here on out is where it's going to be potentially painful. With his other hand, he spreads around Idia's pre-cum, lubricating his palm to make his strokes feel even smoother.

There's that weird dichotomy again, uncomfortable stretch versus really nice handjob. Only now the dial's been turned up a bit and Idia's hips are starting to move in little spasms. It starts feeling better as the pleasure from Cater's stroking settles in, punctuated with sparks when Cater brushes his prostate and leaves Idia moaning past the lip he's biting again. At least his brain is finally accepting the whole concept of in so it's not freaking out with the increased pressure.

"Y-- you've had this d-- done to you?" Yes, please talk to him, Cater. The distraction might be odd but it helps Idia's brain not to focus on the lingering discomfort.

It seems as if they've gotten into a rhythm that Idia can handle, and in his relief Cater's own excitement begins to rise again. "Sort of," he answers. "My experiences have been a little different."

He doesn't want to get into the trials and errors, what he'd learned from his own accidents. It's not like Cater regrets his past experiences or partners--they've all been valuable for what they were, even if some mornings he'd wake up feeling lonelier than ever. What's important is that here and now, he's been able to take what he's learned and put it all to good use for someone he actually loves, someone who deserves to feel amazing in his own body.

"But I've felt the things you're feeling," Cater promises, gentle and slow and careful as he uses his two fingers to widen and stretch Idia's opening. A little bit more, and they should be good enough to go all the way. If they'd stuck to the original gameplan, Cater would've liked to give Idia more time to get his body ready to accommodate intercourse...but this is where they are; they'll have to make it work.

"Hnnn...!" Idia can't help jolting again as Cater stretches him, though it's far less dramatic than his previous one. His opening resists briefly before starting to ease up, and Idia's breathing goes from spiked to a more subdued but still turned-on panting. Okay, it's not so bad now, he's getting used to the weirdness. Cater's voice helps a lot, and isn't it funny how Idia looks forward to hearing his boyfriend talk, whether it's excited chatter or this gentle coaxing? Before, the sound of the other boy's cheerful voice would send the poor Housewarden into a panic, but now it brings him a sense of calm peace. How things change... this quest line evolved in a way he could never have predicted, and if there's anything Idia enjoys it's a good story.

It's their story.

"Feels better now, doesn't really hurt. Just feels... bizarre, I guess? But good, too." He sounds somewhat breathless, his hips thrusting shallowly to meet Cater's hand. Maybe he's not quite ready to come, but he's worried he will the second Cater fully seats inside him. It's not only the physical sensation of it but the mental and emotional weight of finally being so intimately connected. Idia's pretty sure he'll be instantly overwhelmed. "Don't want to climax too fast... don't let me ruin it for us."

Removing his fingers and letting go of Idia's shaft, Cater takes a moment to lean over him, hair spilling over his eyes as he gazes into his boyfriend's pleasure-stricken face. It feels impossible, just how much he loves the other boy, but he's still loving him more and more each and every day. How big can his heart get? How much of this can one person handle?

"Listen to me," he says with a soft sternness, smile playing on his lips. "You could never ruin anything for us."

Idia hasn't been someone who believes in himself for a long time. Praise and reassurance weren't for him. But now, coming from the person he loves? Idia can finally believe in something so heartfelt and kind directed at him. His lip quivers and his eyes go soft and damp, his fingers reaching up to toy with the copper locks hanging around Cater's face.

"Your Persuasion score is so high, I can't argue," he laughs softly, though his voice is thick with emotion. "I love you so much, you ridiculous extrovert."

There's no way that Cater can't kiss Idia when he looks like that, sounds like that. "I love you too, you absurd introvert," he counters, offering one sweet, loving kiss after another and only stopping himself when he threatens to lose himself in the gentleness of the comforting.

Once more, and for what he hopes will be the last time for as long as they can possibly stand, Cater pulls up and away, settling back on his knees. Taking the bottle of lube in hand, he pours out a sizeable dollop to coat his own erection in--the action alone causing him to take in a breath, his eyes fluttering closed. It only takes a few passes before he's fully coated and glistening, and with that done he moves into position to line himself up with Idia's opening.

Finally, this was it. He locks eyes with Idia, one hand braced on his thigh. "Ready?"

His heart's beating so fast it feels like it's vibrating, shaking his ribs. This is it, it's actually happening, he can feel Cater right there and all it will take is one light push. Knowing he could say no and his boyfriend would respect that is an enormous realization, yet Idia knows he won't refuse. They've both wanted this, first as something new to experience as friends, now elevated to a lovers' bonding.

He's going to come apart and he welcomes it.

"Ready," he whispers, his legs coming up to loosely bracket Cater's hips and his arms draped around his shoulders. "I'm all yours."

Cater lets out a breath. He can't help feeling anxious, too. As much as he chastised Idia for worrying that he'd ruin this, Cater feels the same insecurity. What if it hurts too badly but Idia doesn't speak up? What if he can't control himself?

But they love each other. And Idia's arms around him, his legs pressing in, gives him the courage he needs to see this through in turn. Slow and steady, Cater pushes the head of his shaft into Idia. Even slick with lubricant there's of course resistance, but he keeps an eye out for sounds and signs of pain even as the immediate sensation of those walls of skin clamping around him makes his own knees weak.

Moaning sharply, Cater bows his head. It's harder, way harder than he thought it would be, to stay steady. His head swims, and everything inside of him instinctually wants to push in further, to press their bodies together until they can't be joined any closer.

Oh oh oh it's happening and Idia's arms tighten around Cater, a quivering groan sticking in his throat. It's different from the fingers stretching him, firm yet softer and with a greater girth. But it's not only the physical difference, it's the almost gleeful echo of happiness in his head: He took it it's gone oh I'm finally really his! Now he knows why characters in ero-VNs make such blissful, unrestrained sounds, because it feels so incredible to be connected to someone this way when you love them.

His body constricts, squeezing Cater, urging him deeper. Idia's breath goes higher, less even, those gangly legs of his folding over Cater's thighs to cling to his boyfriend and to hold himself open. It burns a little but Idia wants to cry because it's worth the momentary discomfort with every bit of depth Cater gains to know they're joined. Color floods through his flames, bright purple and a bolder shade of pink, those burning locks flickering wildly among the sheets.

"Cater...!" Idia gushes, every fiber of his love and desire for the other boy pouring into the sound. Those hazy golden eyes look at Cater like he hung the sun, moon, and stars in the sky. Can this really get any better? What will it be like when his boyfriend bottoms out? What will it be like when he starts to move?

How is this so incredible? Did he simply overestimate himself and his own stamina, or is it just that he loves Idia so damned much that makes this all so overwhelming? It feels like his whole body is trembling against the urge to pull their pelvises together. He wants to kiss him, to draw his body close, but the sensations are too much for his focus to account for much else.

Idia runs so naturally cool but his insides are just as hot as anyone's, tight and gripping and seeming to beg him in as far as he can get. "Idia, oh, Idia," he moans in return, breathing hard as he presses his forehead into his boyfriend's collarbone. It helps, having that stability. It helps, feeling the press of Idia's arms around him. Once he's all the way inside, it can't have been very long at all but it feels like he's gone through some kind of formative journey, and he wraps his arms underneath Idia as well, hugging him tightly.

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