You'll wear a hole in the floor, pacing like that.
[After about ten minutes, he's finally arrived, a small smile on his face. While he'd gotten off some of the make-up, he's still a bit more done than usual, the make-up enhancing and softening his features.]
[This is where Cater would usually offer some kind of cute, flirty comeback. A corner of his mouth raises at Vil's words, but he only manages to make a small noise before he wordlessly approaches and wraps his arms around the taller blond boy, pressing his forehead into his chest.]
I'm so glad you're here.
[He had been drowning. Trey was keeping his face above water as best as he could, but with Vil here, it finally felt like he was being pulled from the waves.]
[Vil's arms come up immediately, and he wraps them tightly around Cater, settling the side of his head against the teen's.]
Oh, Cater... I'm sorry. I've long since been desensitized to such rabble. I suppose it didn't fully occur to me how... well, traumatizing it can actually be.
[He turns his head and presses a kiss to his temple.]
[The problem with sitting is that it means he has to relinquish his hold on Vil, even if it's only for a moment. Cater takes a deep breath and then nods. The kiss is a stabilizing force. He slips his hand into Vil's before finding a spot to sit against the stone of the tower wall.]
I knew this would probably happen eventually, but I should've asked you to prepare me for it more. For such a big-time Internet user you'd think I'd have been more ready for how vitriolic people could be.
[Especially where Vil is concerned. Anyone that beautiful and with those kinds of numbers in popularity tend to attract even the worst sort of people.]
My Magicam account was completely open, and since I was already your fan and we go to the same school, it was super easy for everyone to find me once that picture of us got leaked.
[He walks with Cater and sits next to him, unoccupied arm coming up to wrap around Cater. He lets their heads rest together.]
Good grief. Wild, untamed spuds, the lot of them.
[He gives his hand a squeeze.]
I'm afraid that... while this initial period will die down, you will always catch some of the spillover from my career. That is the life of a celebrity; constantly under scrutiny and criticism to the point their closest people invariably get caught in the crossfire.
[His hand drifts up and strokes through his hair, his eyes closing. His voice is... unusually solemn.]
That is a lot to ask of you. Of anyone. And... I wouldn't blame you if that wasn't a life you wanted.
[Leaning against Vil, it's easy to let his eyes close, too. His presence is like a balm being spread on a burn. Cater listens, feeling soothed...until Vil's tone of voice grows so sad. He wonders if the fame he has is worth it to him. Living under that constant pressure. The weight Cater has felt from his own pressures already feels like enough to bury him at times, and knowing how much worse it must be for Vil...how can he stand it?
He sits up straight, looking Vil in the face with an intensity bordering on desperation in his eyes.]
The life that I want is the one where I'm by your side, period.
[Everything else that comes with it? It's just something that he'll have to learn how to deal with.]
As long as I'm not holding you back, I'm fine with whatever else happens.
[The light pressure of Vil's forehead against his own his heaven. Sitting there like that and lacing their fingers together, it's so easy to forget about his troubles. In this short moment, it's like the panic attack he had not too long ago had never happened.]
If that's what you're telling me, it doesn't matter what anyone else says.
[The lies, the insults, the threatening language...it all fades to background static underneath Vil's truth.]
[Cater hums out a breath, enjoying the sensation of Vil's fingers in his hair.]
The unstoppable force of Trey combined with my unique magic is taking care of that.
[Poor Riddle. How can he truly be expected to maintain his orderly house when he's got such crafty righthand men?]
I don't need to hurry...and I wouldn't anyway, even if it meant punishment. Just being able to be here with you is worth it. [Pausing, he adds:] And I think Riddle would take it easy on me, just this once.
[Cater chases that lingering kiss, wanting to erase all the stress of the earlier day with it. It's not like the thought of not being with Vil ever crossed his mind to begin with, but this reaffirms all the reasons that it's worth putting up with the harder parts. As long as Vil is here to remind him that he's worth something, he can weather the bad days.]
The real Cater hardly has the energy to take on the world, but...Riddle's got a good heart. Way too uptight, but I'm working on seeing people as the friends that they are.
[After the kiss breaks Cater sighs deeply, falling forward to rest his head in the crook of Vil’s neck.]
Okay. As long as you’re with me I can keep working on it.
[He let’s a quiet moment pass, just savoring the closeness he gets to share with his special person. They do have some serious matters to talk about, though, and Cater knows he’ll feel worse if he doesn’t address them now.]
So…about this whole media storm. Is there anything I should do or not do?
[Vil feels himself calming as well, next to Cater. He settles his chin on the redhead, letting his eyes fall shut.
At the question, he hums softly.]
That is mainly up to you and your comforts and limits.
I will say that engaging with people who attempt to put you down, insult you or otherwise "call you out" is fruitless, but I'm sure you already know that.
[He threads his fingers through his hair again.]
You can choose to engage as your persona, yourself... or not at all.
Either way, I wouldn't take it too seriously. It amounts about as much to rumors and gossip in high school.
[He gives a light sigh.] That being said... I can't imagine some of the things you've already read and heard can be too good on your mind. So I would suggest taking some time off of social media for awhile.
[He’s straight up addicted to his phone and he’ll admit it. Cater closes his eyes, focusing on the sensation of Vil’s fingers in his hair.]
Would you do me a favor and change my notification settings on Magicam? I don’t want to suddenly private everything but I can’t have my phone blowing up constantly…and it’s not like I can just keep it off.
[He’s hoping without the push notifications he’ll be less likely to crawl through the different comments. Baby steps.]
I don’t really plan on actively engaging with anyone but I guess I’m wondering how public you want to be. With me, I mean.
[Vil's words clearly take Cater by surprise. There was, of course, his general self-doubt. Comparing himself to Vil and feeling like he comes up short...but all-in-all, he thought that Vil would simply find it easier to keep things private. Or maybe refreshing, not having to worry about eyes on his active romantic partner. It's a different kind of stress, of course, having to hide, but not being a celebrity himself Cater can't really tell which would be the worse situation. He turns his head to look up at Vil again.]
Really? You would've just announced us from the very first day?
Not announced, per say. I would still allow things to take their natural course, but I probably wouldn't have went through as much effort to stay hidden.
[He kisses Cater's forehead.]
Now, that said, I won't do anything without your blessing. And if you continue to want things as private as possible, we can certainly go that route. It's definitely much more feasible in a secluded location like NRC.
I can handle whatever route we take. My only concern is how it impacts you.
Hah...I've really been so worried about nothing, haven't I?
[Making all these assumptions, pretending it was for Vil's benefit when it was really himself. All his insecurities, the fear of all of this ending. Well, now it's louder and more clear than ever: Vil had said forever and he was holding the door, waiting. Taking his hand, Cater kisses the back of the supermodel's knuckles.]
[What starts as a slow softness from to Vil's kiss turns into enthusiasm, a slowly rising excitement as the possibilities of tomorrow begin to effect his body language. He throws his arms around the other boy's shoulders, wanting to wrap him up with all the affection he's felt for so many years and never let go. Like in one kiss he can communicate all the times he'd watched from afar, wishing he could cheer him on in person. All the times he'd been too put down to reach out, all the times he swallowed his feelings for fear of reproach. Cater wants Vil to feel all of it, see all of it.]
[There's a pleased, slightly surprised hum at the increase in energy, but Vil gives back just as much. He'd missed Cater so damn much. More than he'd ever wanted to admit to himself. The grief of loss would've been immobilizing.
Now he's here and he wants him. Not for his money or for his looks but for him. So much that he would endure panic attacks and nervous meltdowns and toxic fans all for him.
It's enough to take his breath away and make him feel lightheaded.
Feeling emboldened, he decides to test his luck by opening his mouth slightly and pressing his tongue against Cater's lips.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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[After about ten minutes, he's finally arrived, a small smile on his face. While he'd gotten off some of the make-up, he's still a bit more done than usual, the make-up enhancing and softening his features.]
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I'm so glad you're here.
[He had been drowning. Trey was keeping his face above water as best as he could, but with Vil here, it finally felt like he was being pulled from the waves.]
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Oh, Cater... I'm sorry. I've long since been desensitized to such rabble. I suppose it didn't fully occur to me how... well, traumatizing it can actually be.
[He turns his head and presses a kiss to his temple.]
Come. Let's sit.
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I knew this would probably happen eventually, but I should've asked you to prepare me for it more. For such a big-time Internet user you'd think I'd have been more ready for how vitriolic people could be.
[Especially where Vil is concerned. Anyone that beautiful and with those kinds of numbers in popularity tend to attract even the worst sort of people.]
My Magicam account was completely open, and since I was already your fan and we go to the same school, it was super easy for everyone to find me once that picture of us got leaked.
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Good grief. Wild, untamed spuds, the lot of them.
[He gives his hand a squeeze.]
I'm afraid that... while this initial period will die down, you will always catch some of the spillover from my career. That is the life of a celebrity; constantly under scrutiny and criticism to the point their closest people invariably get caught in the crossfire.
[His hand drifts up and strokes through his hair, his eyes closing. His voice is... unusually solemn.]
That is a lot to ask of you. Of anyone. And... I wouldn't blame you if that wasn't a life you wanted.
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He sits up straight, looking Vil in the face with an intensity bordering on desperation in his eyes.]
The life that I want is the one where I'm by your side, period.
[Everything else that comes with it? It's just something that he'll have to learn how to deal with.]
As long as I'm not holding you back, I'm fine with whatever else happens.
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He can't help but give a smile at the last part, and he leans forward, pressing a brief kiss to his lips.]
You holding me back... Now where would you get such a ridiculous notion in your head?
[He lets their foreheads rest together.]
You've made me feel more human than I have in years.
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If that's what you're telling me, it doesn't matter what anyone else says.
[The lies, the insults, the threatening language...it all fades to background static underneath Vil's truth.]
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[Cater really is something else. He stays there for a bit, fingers threading through the soft, auburn locks.]
Don't you need to be going back soon? Wouldn't want to lose your head, and all.
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The unstoppable force of Trey combined with my unique magic is taking care of that.
[Poor Riddle. How can he truly be expected to maintain his orderly house when he's got such crafty righthand men?]
I don't need to hurry...and I wouldn't anyway, even if it meant punishment. Just being able to be here with you is worth it. [Pausing, he adds:] And I think Riddle would take it easy on me, just this once.
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[Impressive. Cater's already discovered his own unique magic as well. His gaze softens at the next part, and he smiles warmly.
The final addition has him giving a curious look.]
What makes you say that?
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[But he doesn't really want to relive that, so hurries to move on with more details.]
So when he came to check on me, I sorta...let him see how I was really feeling.
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Did they, now...
[Mm... but Cater doesn't want to talk about it. So... he'll let it go, for now, his expression smoothing back out.]
Did you? ...I see. [He can't help but smile at that. Cater's already come such a long way.
He presses a kiss to his lips again, holding it for a moment, before pulling back.]
Good. The world needs more of the real Cater.
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The real Cater hardly has the energy to take on the world, but...Riddle's got a good heart. Way too uptight, but I'm working on seeing people as the friends that they are.
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[And he'll go back in for that kiss, since Cater was so eager for it.]
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Okay. As long as you’re with me I can keep working on it.
[He let’s a quiet moment pass, just savoring the closeness he gets to share with his special person. They do have some serious matters to talk about, though, and Cater knows he’ll feel worse if he doesn’t address them now.]
So…about this whole media storm. Is there anything I should do or not do?
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At the question, he hums softly.]
That is mainly up to you and your comforts and limits.
I will say that engaging with people who attempt to put you down, insult you or otherwise "call you out" is fruitless, but I'm sure you already know that.
[He threads his fingers through his hair again.]
You can choose to engage as your persona, yourself... or not at all.
Either way, I wouldn't take it too seriously. It amounts about as much to rumors and gossip in high school.
[He gives a light sigh.] That being said... I can't imagine some of the things you've already read and heard can be too good on your mind. So I would suggest taking some time off of social media for awhile.
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[He’s straight up addicted to his phone and he’ll admit it. Cater closes his eyes, focusing on the sensation of Vil’s fingers in his hair.]
Would you do me a favor and change my notification settings on Magicam? I don’t want to suddenly private everything but I can’t have my phone blowing up constantly…and it’s not like I can just keep it off.
[He’s hoping without the push notifications he’ll be less likely to crawl through the different comments. Baby steps.]
I don’t really plan on actively engaging with anyone but I guess I’m wondering how public you want to be. With me, I mean.
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[Vil is glad Cater is able to keep reasonably calm, especially during such an understandably stressful time.]
Keeping everything private between us from the start was for your benefit.
[He gives a little smile.]
When I'm questioned about it, I intend to be completely honest. There is nothing for me to hide or feel ashamed of.
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Really? You would've just announced us from the very first day?
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[He kisses Cater's forehead.]
Now, that said, I won't do anything without your blessing. And if you continue to want things as private as possible, we can certainly go that route. It's definitely much more feasible in a secluded location like NRC.
I can handle whatever route we take. My only concern is how it impacts you.
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[Making all these assumptions, pretending it was for Vil's benefit when it was really himself. All his insecurities, the fear of all of this ending. Well, now it's louder and more clear than ever: Vil had said forever and he was holding the door, waiting. Taking his hand, Cater kisses the back of the supermodel's knuckles.]
I think I'm done hiding.
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Good. Because there's nothing for you to hide or feel ashamed of, either.
[And he presses a slow, lingering kiss to Cater's lips once more.]
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Now he's here and he wants him. Not for his money or for his looks but for him. So much that he would endure panic attacks and nervous meltdowns and toxic fans all for him.
It's enough to take his breath away and make him feel lightheaded.
Feeling emboldened, he decides to test his luck by opening his mouth slightly and pressing his tongue against Cater's lips.]