IC Inbox - TLV

[caycay]

You've reached Cay-Cay! Feeling Cray-Cray?
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[caycay]

[Cater gives a laugh that doesn't at all sound incredibly fake.]

Totes!

[Oof. Where to even start, and how to put a positive spin on it.]

Soooo, I had some idle chats here and there but as far as honesty goes--Idia and I had a talk, and I'm pretty sure he's not avoiding me anymore. Great, right?

[citizendetective]

Totally. What do you think helped with that? Specifically.

[caycay]

What helped with getting him to stop avoiding me or what helped with getting the chance to talk to him in the first place? Because if it's the former--he finally realized we're more alike than he thought.

[Is it a sort of trauma bonding? Probably.]

If it's the latter...I might have gotten super drunk. Does it still count if I was honest because I was wasted? It counts, right?

[citizendetective]

It's not ideal, but this was also your first try! Next time we'll make being sober a requirement, but for now, I'm still going to count it as a successfully completed assignment.

Was it scary for you?

[caycay]

[Wow...he was expecting a lecture. It throws him off when she actually accepts it as progress. He's quiet for a second as he recalibrates, speaking a bit less happy-go-luckily.]

Not really...I mean, not at first. When I sobered up I was pretty terrified. Well, okay, I was hungover first. And then I was terrified.

[citizendetective]

[Gently:]

It must have been a weighty topic. What was the conversation about?

[caycay]

[Cater, at once, doesn't want to say--because it is a heavy topic, just like she said. And it's not like there's any reason not to trust her, but...well, he just doesn't like talking about it. Still...he has a feeling she might already know some of these things about him.]

In the file you have about me...does it say how I died?

[He doesn't actually know just how much of his bullshit she has clocked from that, alone.]

[citizendetective]

It does. I'm sorry.

[ Whether she's apologizing for the death, or for knowing, or for both - even she isn't totally sure, but it seems like the thing to say. ]

[caycay]

Cool.

[It's so incredibly uncool, is what his tone says. He takes a deep breath, trying to keep his voice lighter than he feels.]

Well, I'd lied about it when he asked me what happened when I first got here. I said something or other while I was shitfaced that clued him into it and he challenged me on it...and I couldn't really keep my lie straight. So...yeah, we talked about that.

[citizendetective]

Was he upset that you'd lied?

[caycay]

...no. I think he understood why it was something I wouldn't just come out and say. It's not exactly a fun "what are you in for" anecdote.

[citizendetective]

I know what you mean. And I hope you know that that's totally an okay thing to keep you yourself - or even to lie about sometimes, depending on the situation! Major personal revelations do not automatically fall under the "be honest with others" clause; you can still choose who to confide in.

[caycay]

I appreciate that.

[If he had to go around telling everyone just how he got here...well, he wouldn't. Didn't matter how little progress it meant he'd make.]

Not exactly my most shining moment. Like, literally the opposite of that. Definitely a on-a-need-to-know-basis kind of thing.

[citizendetective]

I'm glad we're on the same page! So, about the rest of the conversation--?

[caycay]

[That seems to take some of the severity out of Cater's voice. He starts lighting up into the more animated version of himself that he likes to showcase.]

Oh, well, nothing important. I mean I was all weepy, and I cried about how I've liked him for three years and wanted him to pay attention to me. Mega cringe.

[citizendetective]

He didn't say it was cringe, did he?

[Because she will punch a bitch if so.

Metaphorically. Probably.]

[caycay]

Oh, no. No, no. I think he was just surprised. He was way too busy keeping me off the pavement to stop and comment about how cringe I was, anyway.

[Actually, he's kind of surprised, himself, that Idia didn't come back later and call him cringe. He was...gentle, all things considered.]

[citizendetective]

[Misty nods sagely, falling silent for a moment or two. Then--]

It's... kind of a mindfuck, isn't it. When you're vulnerable in front of somebody, even by accident, and they don't take advantage of it the way you expected them to.